A Husband's Guide to : Couple Role Models

So you know those couples that seem to have it all figured out?  They are fun to be around, seem to compliment each other's personality, and never seem to have a fight.  They are both attractive and have the same hobbies and never nit pick each other.  They balance their work life and social life perfectly and drop everything for the other person without complaining.  You know those types of couples?

If you said yes you are either a total liar, or completely clueless.

The perfect couple does not exist.  Sure there are couples that seem to be perfect, or are effortless but the truth is they work at it... or they just fake it really well in front of you.

Pardon me while I segue for a moment...

As you start to get into marriage your single friends begin to either fall by the wayside or morph into couple friends.  This is a natural thing and happens gradually for most people.  Then one day you wake up and your crazy friend Bob is replaced by Bob and Carol, a lovely couple from the neighborhood.  Oh, and your slutty friend Tiffany, is now Tiffany and John and they are pregnant with their third child.  And let's not forget about Carl the confirmed for life bachelor friend of yours...  You only see him about once a year when he is coming through town on a business trip and even then you start to run out of things to talk about.  The simple fact of the matter is that friendships change as you grow, and sure, age changes things but so does being married.

Segue ended...

As you grow and make new couple friends, inevitably you have that perfect couple friendship.  That couple that makes you feel like you are doing something wrong or that seem to never fight, or have tons of money, or have lots of free time, or any number of other things.  But the simple fact of the matter is they are not perfect.  They have disagreements just like you do and they work at things just like you do.

Falling prey to believing you have a perfect couple to role model is just going to make you crazy.  Everyone is different and just because something is working for them does not mean it will work for you. It is ultimately self defeating to compare your relationship to anyone else's.  And remember you only see what the couple wants you to see.

Instead of comparing or trying to find a role model you and your spouse need to find the time to talk and connect about what you each want in your relationship.  Couple fight, couples don't like one another from time to time, couples even need some space every now and again.  That doesn't mean you fail, or have made a mistake.  It just means you are human.

Most couple end up having a fight over little stuff, and not even questioning the big stuff.  When the chips are down can your spouse count on you.  If you said yes, you are already the perfect couple...


ps and continuing my blatant plugging of previous posts I give you: Things I Would Read

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