Terms of Coupling

I had to cover this one because think of all the ways we can say "Making Whoopie"(Making Whoopie did not make the list because it just sounds like you are creating a clone of Whoopie Goldberg in a lab).  Each term really has it's own meaning so here we go.

Last Night We...

  • Made Love - The most romantic way to phrase intercourse in my opinion.  Usually reserved for either the truly romantic, those dudes trying to seem romantic to get some, or most characters played by Leonardo DiCaprio (before The Departed).
  • Had Sex - The classic.  And in all honestly I like the Juxtaposition(no idea why I capitalized Juxtaposition but I am sticking with it, just feels right for a word worth that many points in Words with Friends(like anyone remembers Scrabble any more)) of Made love vs. Had Sex.  Think about it.  Made indicates that you both had to come together to create a physical manifestation of love.  Had Sex sounds like you ordered off the menu at a local Thai Restaurant.
  • Were Intimate - This one feels kind of old school, like instead of saying your wife is pregnant you would say she was in "a woman's way."  Because of connotation we as a society know that means intercourse, but in reality it could just mean that a couple finally shared their intimate feelings about how they feel about Pauly Shore, a bridge my wife and I have already crossed I might add.
  • Got Laid - If I thought I loved the Juxtaposition(still capitalized) of Made Love vs. Had Sex then I really love "Got Laid."  It is usually reserved for the unmarried single male because it conjures images of winning something that you did not earn(which is so often the case in a young man's life).  Got Laid sounds like you won a prize on a radio contest, which lets face it, think back to your sexual skill as a young man, its probably pretty close to truth. 
  • F#?!ed - Okay, this one is vulgar but has to be covered because it is the most carnal of the intercourse terms.  To be honest F'ing is something that generally happens very rarely later in married life but it is still so important.  Reserved for the times when the most passionate displays are required.  Often it occurs after a major fight (or hell during one).
Okay Making Whoopie aside, I am sure you all can think of some terms I missed.  Put them in the comments I would love to read them.


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