Terms of Compliments Part 2

Well, I just read an interesting blog post here (http://lifegems4marriage.com/2009/05/05/avoid-divorce-with-the-51-ratio/).  The article states that it takes 5 positive interactions for every 1 negative interaction to maintain a positive relationship...  That means you husbands have to make sure you are making sure your wife knows how much you care about here...  Terms of Compliments Part 1, was about some things that you can say, for Part 2, I am going write about things to do...  So here are somethings that I do to maintain the 5:1 Ratio :


  • Kiss my wife when she gets home to greet her : To be honest this one stopped happening for a while because we were both busy and often she would come home in a whirl wind and I would be in the middle of some project (that is code word for probably just watching TV).  Now when I hear the garage door open I immediately stop what I am doing to greet her with a kiss and offer to help out with anything she might be bringing in.
  • Holding hands while watching TV : Most nights the wife and I are beat.  Most relationship gurus out there say couples should talk for at least 15 minutes a day.  Honestly, my wife is in the middle of an insanely intense master's program and for the most part when she gets home she is spent.  Rather than talking about her day she likes to just veg out in front of the tv with me.  We have started holding hands while watching TV, it is small but the physical contact is a nice reminder to each other than we care.
  • Say Yes More Often : To be honest I don't like to do much.  I am more content sitting at home watching a movie than I am going out for a night on the town.  That is all well and good, but my wife likes to go out when she has the chance.  In the past I would say no to certain things because I just didn't want to do it.  Now I have adopted a different philosophy.  If I do not want to do it, and I cannot think of an alternative, I just say yes.  See I figure if I really do not want to go see "The Black Swan" then I should be able to think of something else, if I cannot, then I go to the movie because my wife wants to.  I think if you start trying this you will find that you will be able to list off several things you want to do when applied with the proper motivation.
  • Don't Spoil the good moments : There you are, having a great time chatting, having drinks, or whatever and you think your wife is agreeable so now is the time to bring up something that has been bothering you...  WRONG!  If you and your wife are having a good time, don't consider it an open invitation to bring up something that has been festering.  Instead enjoy the precious seconds as they come.  Here is the rule : If you both are having a good time, don't ruin it with a fight you want to have.  
These are just some of the ideas that I have, but I am sure you have something that I have not thought of.  Please share by using the comments.


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